Friday, February 3, 2012

What It Was Like...

My husband asked me a week ago Monday, "So, what does it feel like to hold your first published book in your hands?"  Maybe you've wondered about my response.  I have.

Two weeks later I think I can finally articlate the sensations of that moment.

First, I noticed the nervous energy that I felt everytime I was the new kid in the classroom (this happened alot during my kindergarten-12th grade experience).  "Will they like it (me)?  What will they think about the book (me)?"  That kind of nervousness.  You know the kind.

And after that passed there was a sense of abiding satisfaction.  Job well done!  Woo hoo!  Finally, it is here!  Diligence and hard work has it's rewards! Let's have a toast and celebrate kind of satisfaction.

And finally, to be honest, I was left with an open space.  I have been mulling over this feeling.  It is not an ugly emptyiness nor a scary thing.  Almost like I am suddenly noticing that I am hungry kind-of-a-feeling.  An open space that will only be satisfied with more... more writing, more sharing, more thinking, and more wrestling with faith and life.

Does this mean I have a hankerin' to hold my second, third and fourth (etc.) published book in my hands?  I think the answer is obvious.

Crap- that means what Todd has is contagious! 

(People need to be warned.)

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