Musings

Rainy afternoon are designed for long novels, hot tea and blankets... not desk top computers, deadlines and interupptions. So, here I am trying to get the busyness and business of churchn minstry accomplished when my inner self is crying out for candles and fuzzy covers.

I have found day to day living a bit awkward having finished all the work of care-giving and the final details of funerals and follow up thank youn otes. The question unasked in my mind is, "so what's next?" How does a person go on living after a death, a life-change, the passing of the torch from one generation to another?

You just do.

Seems to be the only thing I have come up with in the past two weeks... You just put your socks on one at a time like you did the day before. You plan things. You hope for things. You cry when you the need arises within you.

The Enterprise on Star Trek movies/TV series smoothly transitions from warp speed to impulse power. Not so smooth is the transition from emotionally charged care giving and death to the new routine of live and living.

While it may be bumpy... I have discovered no one does this journey completely alone.

October Birthdays

Maybe your family is like my husband's family. You have a whole bunch of birthdays clumped together in one month. We counted recently that there are over eight birthdays within Eric's family. This does not count our wedding anniversary.

All of these special events caused me to stop by the greeting card store. I inqured if they offered a bulk rate in birthday cards. No such luck.

Our daughter too was set to be born in this month until she had other plans and arrived six weeks early. I thank her every year that she saved us from ANOTHER birthday in October.

What all this really means is that the parents of all these birthday people were very busy in February. And what special day is in February? Yes, that is right, Valentine's Day. Or at least it was winter and folks needed to do something to keep warm.

My family is the opposite. Our large birthday month is May... which means folks were busy in September. And I have no idea what that means.

Anyway- to everyone in the family : John, Jim, Jane, Brittney, Greg, Lee Ellen, Eric, and Aubrey- happy birthday month. You've bankrupted me in cards! So there will be nothing coming in the mail...

I've forgotten...

... how to write. Apparently, it has now been weeks since I last posted. Maybe my five followers have not noticed my absence because they were busy with their lives and more important things.

I have just been swallowed up in helping care for my Grandmother and the basics of family, work and home. But now that Gram is enjoying her eternal rest... perhaps we can rest up and give you something to read on this blog.

I'll be back! Soon, with more posts!

Blogs that Aren't

I find that there is something oddly comforting about the sound of my dishwasher. My guess is it has something to do with providing normalcy and routine... or I just like the sound of swishing water. Whatever the case may be I blog today as my dishwasher swishes and hums along.

This month may be a record of the least blogs ever written in a month. It is not because I don't have anything to say, but rather there is a too much to say. And the stuff that needed to get done had higher priority. Here is a list of things I could've blogged about, but didn't:

1. Put my dog on allergy medicine for third round of itchiness this summer. He gets his own spoonful of medicine twice daily!
2. Uprooted and harvested the last of our garden crops. Carrots this year were great! And found a baby bunny living in our tangled tomato vines.
3. My husband's attempt to out-bake my chocolate zuccihini bread turned into a total fiasco in baking. (but the kid had fun helping!)
4. Watching my mother and aunt attempt to provide care for my ill grandmother has all sorts of material to ponder, muse and mull... could have been funny, or tragic, or poignant or weird blogs too.
5. List of ways to survive a Chuck E Cheese birthday party (that do not include alcohol) with your 7 year old and her 7 friends.
6. A non-fiction article on how to best edit your book while sitting at the hospital with your dying grandmother and snoring mother.
7. and a blog about the "pumpkin that almost wasn't". Our daughter has been growing pumpkins and watermelons at Grandma Jo's farm. Her pumpkin plant there had over 35 blooms and only one pumpkin!

Sadly, I haven't taken the time to write about any of these little adventures. I'll just trust your imagination to fill in the gaps that I could have written about OR I will simply mine these treasures another day.

Oops, gotta go. The dishwasher stopped swishing. Dry cycle is so un-creative.

And so it goes...

After my husband and I survived the chaos and craziness of the kid birthday party at Chuck E Cheese...we headed home to unpack the car and prepare for the family cookout. All was ready and prepared and we were set to go, then my mother got the call that her mother was being transported back tot he hospital again.

The party went on... then later I made my way to the hospital for the upteenth time in three weeks (we have all lost count).

As I blog my mother and aunt are making decisions about the upcoming hospice care my grandmother will receive. We want her to be comfortable and with folks who will care for her best. All of us in our different ways and means are saying and preparing ourselves for the 'goodbye' that is coming soon.

Last week I sang to a lovely lady in our congregation the song, "Soon and Very Soon." I find myself humming that again as thankful tears fall down my cheeks for my grandmother's well lived life. She has been a tremendous positive influence on my and many others. And I know she will see the King, my grandfather, my cousin and her sister all very, very soon.

Soon and very soon we are going to see the King, hallelujah!

Soon and very soon we are going to see the King; hallelujah!

Soon and very soon, we are going to see the King.

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! We're going to see the King.

No more dying there...

No more crying there, we are going to see the King.

Birthday Arrival

Seven years ago today I complained to my husband that I was "tired of being pregnant". My announcement proved to be a prophecy hours later when my water broke... and the birthing process began.

In between funeral and worship plans, retreat preparations, and the transition of my grandmother to a nursing care facility, we will pause everything at our house to celebrate a special birthday! Her parties (yes, she receives two) will be on Saturday, but tomorrow we will honor as the special day it is.

After I make her a special breakfast of chocolate chip muffins, I plan on going her to her school for lunch. Holy toledo, it is corn dog day! My daughter informed me with great emphasis that "lunch is a noisiest place on earth!" The social world of first graders sounds like an intriguing place to be. I shall put all my anthropology, psychology and sociology to good use tomorrow!

Pup Crisis, again

Yesterday afternoon in the horribly oppressive heat I came home to let the dog out and work on my computer a bit. Earlier I had been at the hospital all day with my grandmother who was awaiting a heart cath. I was behind in my email correspondence and a half dozen other things because the firewalls my husband put on my computer prevented me from getting on the public internet. Thus, my day resulted in an impromptu family reunion in a waiting room. I don't mind catching up with my family, it just made me itchy to get on the computer when I got home.

I say all this so you understand why I may have let the dog stay outside a bit longer than normal on a 105 heat index day. I did check on him once and in that moment he was fine.

Less than ten minutes later I caught sight of him... foaming at the mouth, woozy and wobbly on his feet, hair along his back standing straight up. Poor thing. I couldn't tell if he was having a seizure again, or heat stroke, or some goofy neighbor had given him beer.

You've read about my dog before... he eats rocks, tissues, and Barbie doll shoes. Duke sheds more pounds than he eats. Lately he has been stealing my daughters half-ripe tomatoes right off of the vine. Duke's only two remarkable qualities are he doesn't bark and he is darn cute.

He didn't smell like beer so I am now assuming that it was one of the other two issues. After a day at the hospital... I was a mess trying to figure out how to help this 100 pounds of fur. Getting him hydrated took three bowls of water. Finally, I got him to lay down in front of a box fan as he slowly regained his coordination.

Then, he was fine. And I was not.