Laughter on the Labyrinth

Last Tuesday in our afternoon group of kindergarten and pre-kindergarten students- I shared the labyrinth. It was a hoot!

At first the kids all told me that the large canvas spread on the fellowship hall floor was a maze. Not so, I told them. Mazes want you to get lost. They are a game to play. Labyrinths are not a game. They are a tool for prayer. A labyrinth will never ever get you lost because there is only one path into the center and the same path back out. Ah- these kids were now intrigued.

I told them to help me find the 'cross' in the labyrinth and we did. Then we found the rose in the center and the lunations around the edges.

Finally it was time to 'let them loose' on the path. And we did- they laughed and giggled the whole way! Some decided it was time to pretend to be a car and they 'drove around'. Others hopped, skipped and jumped through the twists and turns.

When they were all done walking in and back out again (after awhile it was hard to tell what they were doing), I had the students sit on their favorite spot on the labyrinth.

I asked them what they liked most about the labyrinth (because it was obvious that these 5 and 6 year olds were having fun!). Their most common answer is the complete opposite of what most adults tell me. They liked the turns and twists. Most adults get frustrated with the turns and twists and like the longer straighter paths. Hmm... what does that say about where we've been in life and where we're going?!?!

Have you laughed on a labyrinth this week? If not, come visit and we'll take off our shoes for a 'drive.'

Weird Does Me Good

Weird day. Ever had such a odd collection of moments in one day that all you could say was, "That was weird?!" That is my today.

Meetings, conversations, writing, Fish Fry preparations, weather, Pumpkin Patch arrival, salary planning for 2010, emails, correspondence, worship planning, casserole deliveries, helping folks with their rent, watching a great movie on Africa, and prayer my mother in law's chemotherapy start- these are just a few of the moments in my day. And that doesn't even touch the housework that awaits me at home tonight!

Actually, at the moment I am taking a break from pounding the keyboard for words and banging my brain for more ideas on the book Todd and I are writing together. Whew. It is one thing to write for pleasure- and another thing for an editorial audience. Yikes. If you see me at Walmart dazed and confused, now you know the reason why. I shall get my chapters done, Todd, I promise!

But the most important thing is- fish! Right?!

Friday's Labyrinth Walk

the following is a brief reflection on my labyrinth walk with Shirley (retreat leader) prior to the retreat beginning last Friday.

Scattered everywhere
what a mess!
crunch, rustle under my feet

tiny strips of something
are you feathers?
could be twigs,
no, must be little bits of leaves.

don't you know you're in the way!?

oh, why do you stay
and stick to my shoes
as I walk this path?

there are more here,
less there.
you clump together, don't you?

winds of spirit blew you here
from somewhere else
sprinkled like seasonings on my path

Labyrinth Count Down

Less than 24 hours from now I will be walking on one of my favorite labyrinths! Yippee!

For those of you not into labyrinths- this is very exciting for me. And it means a terrific opportunity for prayer, reflection, quiet time etc. Yeah. And I need this time/space.

24 hours and counting down...cannot wait to walk the path!

A Pastor's Report

Every year our annual conference of the UMC asks pastors to reveiw the past year of ministry and file this report as a part of our Charge Conference gathering. Because I don't think anyone has ever read my report and it will fill someone else's file cabinet- I thought I would share it with my faithful blog readers. **warning: content may make you sleepy**

This year I join a small, but mighty group of United Methodist pastors who have served one church for ten or more years. I am stunned by the acknowledgement of this accomplishment as well as humbled by this vocational experience. This marks new territory for myself professionally as well as a new era for the congregation in which I serve (I am only the third pastor in Calvary's history to obtain this goal.)

My gratitude remains as we move into this tenth year of service together. I am grateful for the terrific collegial support and encouragement that I receive daily from Todd. What a trooper to put up with me all the time! Our staff and lay leadership continues to offer me their confidence and support in ministry and leadership. Thank you to all!

Longevity in ministry can afford a leader/prophet/preacher with a variety of pitfalls as well as perks. Perks come in knowing the stories of people and living life with them for ten years plus. We have history together! Perks come therefore in the arena of trust, intimacy, familiarity, and knowledge. It is a perk to have enough long term knowledge of the insides of an institution that I can witness her change, move, and have her being in the midst of our culture and world transitions.

Pitfalls are numerous. I can no longer blame mistakes on being a ‘newbie’ in ministry nor even on the people themselves. Their foibles as a church now reflect the weakness and vulnerabilities within my own leadership/psyche/personality. This confession is a tough one to swallow and one that invites me ever more to prayer, confession, and repentance. “How do I make myself new by the Holy Spirit in this place?” I ask.

Enough rambling of a want-to-be-mystic in churchy plainclothes!

We’ve grown in every category numerically (worship attendance, small groups, youth, confirmation classes, number of profession by faiths, missionaries, folks intending on vocations in ministry, etc), but one. We are attracting lots of previously lukewarm, never churched before Christians in training. It is exciting and challenging!!

The one area of non-growth, but even backwards movement is finance. We are not growing givers (i.e. want to be tithers). Our income is slim. And our budget is lean. Calvary is over worked, understaffed, and underfinanced for the size and quality of ministry that we provide our community. And frankly, I am not sure how best to attack, solve, wrestle, and improve this spiritual problem. Ideas are welcome.

Retreat Re-paired

Sometimes during the week prior to our annual women's retreat I feel like I am preparing to be re-paired. As if I can take all my brokenness, problems, situations, wounds, and worries to one place at one location and leave them there for repair. Good definition for a retreat, huh?!

Sometimes going to a different location, being with different people, changing the routine, and mixing all that up with prayer, scripture, worship and song does indeed make a difference.

My cry becomes, "Fix me, Jesus. Fix me." Repair my wounded heart. Heal me of my brokenness. Soothe my worries.

Great thing is that I know God will meet me or I will meet God- then the fixing will begin. See you at the repair shop.

Remembering

Remembering holds us together. Remembering keeps us watchful and mindful. Remembering honors lives lived and lost as well as lives that are yet to be.

Remembering links the past into the present. Remembering gives us wisdom for our future.

Today is a good day to remember...New York, Pennsylvania, and Washington DC and the place/moment you were in when you heard/saw the events of September 11, 2001. Never forget.

Remembering is vital to shaping where and how we go from here.

How To Celebrate a 5th Birthday

You will need:

• your favorite foods for dinner
• lots of presents: one of them being a new movie and another a new tent
• loving parents
• cookies-n-cream ice cream

Now, put the tent up in the middle of the living room. Gather all the pillows, blankets you can find and put them in the tent.

Grab your portable DVD player and your new movie. Pop in the movie so that you can watch it from within your tent.

Get spoons to eat your cookies-n-cream ice cream while you view your favorite film. Sigh.

Lean back and relax and enjoy the show! That's a great birthday!

Hallmark Got It Right

On a quick errand to finish shopping for my daughter's upcoming birthday- I ran into our local Hallmark store. I got for her what I needed- then my eye caught a new section of greeting cards.

First thing you need to know about me- I am a sucker for greeting cards. I love to send cards and I love to get cards. I send cards all the time. I am the only one in our house who uses stamps. My love language is words! I am a writer, don't you know?!

These new greeting cards I found were awesome. I read every one they had and literally sat in the store's aisle and cried. Each card said better and more eloquently than I can say what I want to say to my mother in law about her cancer/upcoming treatments.

You can guess what happened next; I bought a whole bunch. Tear strained and way over my shopping budget I made it to the check out counter. I complimented the store owner on these cards. She knowingly smiled and handed me a tissue with my change. Sigh.

Sermons, Spirit and Circumstances

For those of you who 'sat in' on the sermon I gave this weekend and have sent your comments email or in person- thank you.

I thought it would be important to blog and clarify one point. That is- I didn't write the sermon. And I didn't plagiarize it either. For the past two weeks the Holy Spirit has been whispering to me about the James 1:17-27 passage. And because of circumstances last week, I was in no condition to go through my normal hours of reading, preparation, writing and editing process. The sermon was written in little over an hour last Friday afternoon. A rare occurance and a new record. (That's why I cannot take the credit.)

Today I feel like a Muppet after Jim Henson has left the building. The hand that was working through me and has left me empty, tired and depleted- another indication that I wasn't really in charge of what took place this weekend.

And it is a gift because on Monday while my husband flew home from California we received the biopsy results that confirmed that my mother in law's stage four breast cancer from 2001 has returned. Her doctor calls this 'incurable breats cancer' because it will always come back. Chemotherapy treatments will help us run ahead of it for as long as she has life, but that is about it. And the chemo will either do the job or it will not.

After he got home we talked late into the night about our grief, our sadness, our loss and how to help our daughter through this experience at such a young age.

On Wednesday my husband and I took long lunches to visit Mom, take her a care package, Holy Communion, and some food. When we got there her breathing was so severely compromised (because the lymph nodes are so swollen with cancer cells and are pushing on the larynx and sternum) that we rushed her to the hospital. She passed out and her heart stopped beating. Before medical intervention could be initiated, her heart resumed beating.

She then was given radiation treatments and will have ten more before starting the chemo. The radiation along with a few other things has given her some relief for her breathing.

By Friday I was in no condition to write a sermon and thanks be to God- God's Spirit did the work and then helped me give a sermon with great passion and conviction. A sermon that I needed preached to me as much as our congregation needed to hear it.

So, don't thank me if you were moved- thank the Spirit.